How to Home School Children with Behavioral Challenges
I personally find it useful to have a list of behavioral strategies handy, especially on my harder days. On this page, I have addressed behavioral challenges parents and teachers might encounter in children; and I have suggested practical strategies about how to home school children who may have some of the listed challenges. This information particularly applies to children with Asperger's Syndrome and with nonverbal learning disabilities, but many of the teaching strategies can be applied to those with multiple needs and challenges. A child may or may not display all of the obstacles listed. I based many of the challenges on my own experience with children with special needs, and several
resource books. I hope this information will assist you in your journey. Take what you can use and leave the rest behind. Behavior Challenges: Will do the following to avoid performing a task or listening: throw a tantrum, refuse with defiance, hide from the situation (under jacket hood, beneath a desk), complain of fatigue, make a rude comment Short attention span Difficult maintaining balanced level of emotional arousal, either too low or too high Impulsive behavior is often a result of a perception of someone's high-expectations Doesn't anticipate the consequence of her actions Multi-tasking is overwhelming Weak visual-spatial planning, e.g. bump into walls, objects, and other people Mentally cannot organize new situations and becomes frightened Hard to perceive problems Meltdowns/Tantrums from sensory overload Constant insecurity about what possibly might happen and how others may or may not behave Uncertain how to behave in new situations High anxiety Risk of self-injury and depression Feels under pressure to perform and behave Doesn't anticipate the consequences of her actions Every day experiences seem random and unpredictable Can be violent towards others and not perceive his own strength Difficult judging when a "line has been crossed", such as kicking too hard during play fighting or holding down for extended amount of time during a game of tag Takes risks and doesn't evaluate danger of the situation Fears and phobias Obsessive thoughts Can have increased internal pressure to escape a situation, but cannot retrieve the information he needs to know what to do next.
Irritated by sensations on skin, such as itchy scalp and arms Makes repetitive noises, e.g. a vocal sound, tapping, scraping Bores easily Sensitive to sensations, such as hunger, a full bladder, dry skin Frustrated by inability to excel Preoccupied with details instead of evaluating and processing the whole picture 1. Decide and practice an agreed upon signal a child can give when he feels like he is about to misbehave or burst(tantrum). 2. Verbally explain what behavior is not acceptable and provide visual examples of positive behavior, by pointing out children playing well together, characters in books and on television, and other positive role models. 3. Avoid situations where there are not positive role models. 4. Give gentle reminders, e.g. "It's time to work right now." 5. Offer a sense of control and outcome, e.g. "It's time to work right now, but you can finish that magazine in twenty minutes; let's set the timer." 6. Offer choices, e.g. "It's time to work right now. Would you like to finish that magazine at lunch time or after this lesson?" 7. Honor the child's need for rest time or "down time" and remind him to take breaks and go to a quiet, safe place. 8. Identify triggers, make a list and keep record of when melt downs occur. Avoid the triggers whenever possible. With older children, logically discuss the triggers and what is happening in their bodies when they are upset. How does their stomach feel? Their Chest? Is their heart beating fast? 9. Redirect- Keep something of high interest close to hand or in your pocket at all times. For instance, if your child loves Pokemon, keep a Pokemon card he hasn't seen in your pocket and pull it out right before a melt down or loss of control. Possible ideas might include an unusual coin, stamp, gum, candy, etc. Redirect with an unusual comment, action, or silly song. 10. Create a hand signal to indicate to the child when she needs to calm down or focus. Use touch and eye contact. 11. Review the techinques for sensory challenges since many of the behavioral issues are related to sensory overload and sensory sensitivity. 12. Limit internal stimulants. This could be in the form of caffeine, sugar, or food dyes. Pay attention to what your child puts in her mouth and the behaviors which follow. 13. Limit physical stimulants. This could be the television, computer, certain people, or other sensory issues. 14. Review with your child what happened and make a list of positive alternative ways to behave. Throw a pillow; beat a stuffed animal; scribble; write in a journal; yell in your room with the door shut; write bad words on a paper and then throw it in the garbage; call a friend or relative; ask some alone time; etc. 15. Evaluate positive behavior and improvement. Discuss and point out when he is acting appropriately. Reward actions. 16. Give too much praise. Go out of your way to point out when a child is doing well. 17. Avoid tests. Give "evaluations" or "reviews" instead. Give oral exams instead of written. 18. Give details about work. How long with the review last? What will happen if a problem is missed? Who will see the paper? What happens if an answer is unknown? 18. Give details about events. Explain when events will change; what might happen; who might be there; how the child will be affected; when things will get back to "normal". 19. Provide predictability is assignments, schedules, home life, sporting events, and other situations. 20. Introduce variety with safe boundaries. Explain the situation. Ask how the child feels. Use words like: "Let's try this out together and let me know what you think; we don't have to do it this way, but it might be fun." 21. Adhere to schedules. Keep events as consistent as possible. For example, give supplements at seven p.m, wake up at seven a.m., go to bed at 8 p.m., start school at 9 a.m.,etc. 22. Use a school schedule. Laminate a schedule or post a schedule on a bulletin board. Review the schedule. Consider having alternate schedules. One standard school schedule, a schedule with free choices, a schedule for when you or the child isn't feeling well, etc. Rotate the schedules and follow them. 23. Choose your battles. Don't use a lot of energy arguing, redirecting, worrying, or discussing a behavior that is likely to change in a few days time or a behavior that doesn't affect anyone to a great degree. Judge what you can and cannot live with on a daily basis. 24. Accept the child's limitations. Accept he is disabled. Know she is behaving to the best of her ability. 25. Know the behaviors will change. Accept the hair pulling, deep sighing, feet scraping, spitting, etc. and learn to live with the inconveniences, knowing this phase will pass. 26. Correct undesired behaviors in private. 27. Consider reading about managing phobias. (resource link coming soon) 28. Don't judge yourself by your child's behaviors. 29. Research and read books on your child's disability and make lists of strategies. (resource link coming soon) 30. Join a support group with parents with children with special needs. 31. Consider therapy or church counseling for you and/or your child. 32. Pray and/or reflect with your child. 33. Pull yourself away from the situation. Don't try to do everything yourself. Ask for help. Do a child swap. Pay a sitter. Keep yourself emotionally healthy for you and your child. 34. Buy books about special needs for your child to read. There are some wonderful picture books. Share with him that everyone has special needs. We all have challenges we have to overcome. Encourage your child to be the best person she can be. 35. Love your child unconditionally and let him know it. "No matter what you do, I will always love you." 36. Separate the behavior from the person. "I am very upset with your behavior." 37. Consider dietary changes, such as gluten-free, dairy-free, or buying organic. (article coming soon) 38. Start having family meetings. (article coming soon) 39. Use behavior charts and incentives. (article coming soon) 40. Give logical consequences to actions. Try to remain calm and in control. Avoid behaving in a way you would not wish your child to mimic. 41. Find a hobby, sport, or interest that builds your child's self-confidence. Celebrate her achievements. 42. Celebrate a child's strengths. "You're good at noticing details." "I noticed you are very honest; what an admirable trait." "What an amazing memory you have!" "Do you know how bright you are? Most people would have never thought of that.""You are a very deep thinker. A lot of people who have done great things for humanity were deep thinkers just like you." "When you grown up you are going to do something important in the world." "You didn't know how to control yourself last year, but look at how much you've learned. I am so proud of you. Let's call Dad and tell him how well you behaved." (Article on instructional modifications coming soon)
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